This pic has been floating around the Internet for about a week now and what kind of shark freak would I be if I didn't post it?
This Bull shark was spotted off the coast of Florida shortly after the second attack last week.
People...if you're gonna go swimming off Florida's Panhandle in El Golfo de Mexico (or anyplace that has water), for God's sake be smart and don't set yourself up for disaster!!! If you follow a few simple, common sense rules, you WON'T get bit.
Read this and learn...
(1) Don't swim after dark when visibility is bad. Yes it's true, sharks have excellent vision, but just like humans, their eyesight diminishes in the failing light. These are not cats. With a few exceptions, sharks can't see very well in the dark. They might mistake you for something they actually WANT to eat.
(2) Don't swim at dusk or dawn. This is when most sharks are practicing active predation. This is when they do the most of their hunting. Don't ask why, nobody knows for sure. They just do.
(3) Don't swim if you have cuts, abrasions, or even scabs. Just because blood is dry doesn't mean it still doesn't leave a scent in the water. And we all know what sharks do when they smell blood.
(4) Don't swim out too far. Yes morons, it is very difficult for lifeguards to help you if it takes them 15 minutes to get to you. And what the hell are you doing that far out anyway? Are you fucking Johnny Weismuller or Mark Spitz? Just because water is shallow doesn't mean you can't swim in it. Stay close to shore, thrill seekers.
(5) This one's for all you surfers and boogeyboarders. If you need a break, go to the shore. If you lounge on your board floating on the surface, you're practically ringing the dinnerbell because you look just like...
yep, you guessed it- a big, fat seal bobbing with the waves. If you are too dumb or lazy to paddle to the beach to take a nap, you deserve to get bitten in half.
(6) Don't swim with seals or dolphins. I don't care how cute they are. Amongst seals, you would be the slowest. It's no coincidence that sharks don't hunt the pack leaders. If you are the slowest, you're probably gonna be the deadest. And dolphins, despite what you remember from Flipper reruns or those rare instances we heard in the news, probably won't fight off a shark to save you. Once they detect danger, they are out of there like Rush Limbaugh at a Weight Watcher's meeting. That leaves you to fend off the world's greatest predator in their element. One less moron = the rest of the morons wanting to kill a magnificent creature because you were busy being cutey-patutey with the dolphins that abandoned you.
(7) Avoid swimming if there are seagulls flocking over an area close to shore. Seagulls are attracted to baitfish and baitfish are attracted to the same things that attract sharks.
All joking aside, be careful out there. Remember that the odds of winning Lotto are better than even seeing a shark at the beach. More people are bitten by dogs than sharks annually. More people die from bee stings than shark bites annually. Don't think about it and you will have fun at the beach.
Don't think about what? Exactly.
Here is the games list...
A 3-D version of Pong called, CURVEBALL.
http://kontraband.com/show/show.asp?ID=931&rtn=main-topten
A personal fave, Mad Shark-
http://www.ebaumsworld.com/madshark.html
The very cool De-Animator. Beat my record of 538 zombies creamed...
http://www.ebaumsworld.com/deanimator.html
A variation of the classic Breakout called, Breakit...
http://www.ebaumsworld.com/breakit.html
Bumper cars meet Air Hockey in Bumperball...
http://www.ebaumsworld.com/bumperball.html
See how far you can knock these penguins...
http://n.ethz.ch/student/mkos/pinguin.swf
My record is 313 feet.
Help this drunk stagger home...
http://www.ebaumsworld.com/homerun.html
Try to beat my 412 meters.
The water supply to Chasmtown has mysteriously stopped. It's up to you to solve the mystery. I completed this game in under an hour...good luck!
http://www.ebaumsworld.com/chasm.html
Watch this girl fall and bounce lifelessly on randomly placed bubbles...
http://www.ebaumsworld.com/flash/bubblegirl.html
Click and drag to throw her body around too!
Test your aim with Papertoss...
http://www.ebaumsworld.com/papertoss.html
Until next time...
you should live and be well!
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