Friday, September 17, 2004

NFL picks, week 2 & crazy photos

Hey kids,
The Turzman here with my NFL picks for week 2.
But first, I have to share these photos that I found at with you...

This is crazy.

So here are my football picks and as usual, first team listed is my pick to win, straight up; no point spread factored in. But the asterisk (*) next to a pick means I think the game will be close and the spread should be considered. Home team is in CAPS...Here goes.

Carolina over KANSAS CITY *
TENNESSEE over Indianapolis *
NEW ORLEANS over San Francisco
Washington over NEW YORK GIANTS
OAKLAND over Buffalo *
New England over ARIZONA *
GREEN BAY over Chicago
Houston over DETROIT *
BALTIMORE over Pittsburgh *
St. Louis over ATLANTA *
Seattle over TAMPA BAY
DALLAS over Cleveland *
New York Jets over SAN DIEGO*

Monday night:
PHILADELPHIA over Minnesota *
Tie breaker combined score: 64

Any thoughts?- Call my PhanFone at 909 - 881 - 3654 or shoot me an e-mail:

Good luck handicappers, and don't take any shit from anybody.


Thursday, September 16, 2004

Live Great White in captivity!!

Hey kids...
The Turzman here with some very exciting news. The Monterey Bay Aquarium up in NoCal has a live, four foot long female great white shark on display and seems to be doing well.
Link to Monterey Bay Aquarium website 411 on the shark:

The aquarium also has live webcams in the shark tank, viewable between 7 am and 7 pm.
At other times, they show pre-recorded footage from the shark tank--awesome!!!

To see some videos of the great white in its new home, goto

It will be intersting to see how long this young girl can survive. Previously, the longest stint a great white has managed in a fish tank is 16 days.

In other news, tonight I watched the Coyote Women's volleyball team sweep the Antelopes of Grand Canyon University, 3-nil.
I talked to head coach Kim Cherniss before the match and she informed me that Jessica Nelthorpe would not suit up tonight due to a strained hamstring that was aggravated last night against UC San Diego. (Press release on CSUSB vs. UCSD: ).

I'd like to offer my humblest apologies to Ms. Nelthorpe for being cross in an earlier post, saying she "had nothing" against the Tritons. She hurt herself and played through the pain. Her diligence is a tribute to the CSUSB v-ball program and is a reflection of the work ethic installed into these warriors by coach Cherniss and assistant coach Danny Scott. The good news is Coach Cherniss expects this game to be the only one Nelthorpe will miss, get well soon, number seven!

I've always wondered what it tasted like--eating crow, I feel surprisingly relieved!

Come back here later this week for my NFL week 2 picks. I want some challenges, people!
If I'm successful againt my friends and listeners, I'll try my luck at the local Indian Casino and Bingo Parlor.

I'll also have updates on Coyote soccer & cross-country later this week.

Bye kids, and don't take any shit from anybody!


Lady "Yotes fall to UC San Diego

Hey kids,

The Turzman here with an update on Coyote Volleyball.
Last night in a game that should've been broadcast over Coyote Radio but wasn't (see yesterday's post--rant section), the ladies dropped a heartbreaker to the UC San Diego Tritons (ranked #2 in the nation), 3-1.
It seemed the 'yotes were flat, Jessica Nelthorpe had nothing (turns out she was playing on a bum leg), Amy Long was hitting the ball all over the arena except in-bounds, and the defense is still a little shakey.
Brie Harris, the 'yote's big gun was held at bay. Her kill attempts were up there, but her percentage was low, the Tritons did their homework and were ready for her.
Kathleen Price (who goes by "Kat" now, for whatever reason) was the only consistent factor for the yotes in the middle, being the most efficient attacker with a .515 kill percentage. But with only 19 kills over the four games, just wasn't enough.

On a personal note, I fell in love with Triton MB Kendra Canape (#10) over the course of the evening. She's beautiful and a firecracker on the court. What I wouldn't give to take her to dinner, dancing and a movie.
Oh well, I'll get over it. I always do.

Check this site before this weekend to catch my picks for NFL week 2. Week 1 I was 9-7 straight up but only 8-8 against the spread. Nobody does good week 1 though, 8 wins would have earned 2nd or 3rd place in your basic office pool. I predict at least 10 wins this weekend.

Send me your picks and we can gamble (just keep it hush-hush).
or call me at 909-881-3654.

If there's anybody reading this that knows UC San Diego Triton MB Kendra Canape, tell her she's got a fan in The Turzman.

That's all for now, I'm gonna go find a nice quiet corner and cry for a while.


Wednesday, September 15, 2004

NFL, Coyote sports...

Okay, so I under-estimated Brett Favre and the Green Bay offense Monday night.
But I purport that Carolina has the best defense in the NFL, and Kansas City does not.
Look for Carolina to upset the "Chefs" at Arrowhead, making KC 0-2 out of the gate.
Any bets brewing out there, Wes?
Hey Johnny, I'm picking the Raiders to beat Buffalo, but barely. Surprisingly, they match up pretty evenly on paper. Any Raider fans want to lay some points, I'm taking the Bills and 6 1/2.

I'll post complete week 2 picks later, maybe Friday or Saturday.

Do you want to pick against the experts?
Goto (Sports and enter the weekly pick-pool. It's free, and you can test your handicapping skills against some of the finest sports minds.

Have you taken my advice and visited the funniest media website on the intranet?
Well dammit, go there now!!!

Coyote Athletics update...
Men's and women's soccer each hosted Cal State Bakersfield to open CCAA conference play but with mixed results...
The men dropped a 1 - nil heartbreaker in overtime to go to 2-3 overall (0-1 conference).
The women creamed the Bakkies, 3-0. They are 3-2 overall (1-0 conference).

Time for a rant...
Women's volleyball is hosting UC San Diego tonight and Coyote Radio is still unable to broadcast live. I was informed yesterday that the equipment will not be ready until classes start, after Sept. 23. Well I say that is intolerable.
CSUSB has one of the top volleyball programs IN THE NATION and I'm getting absolutely no support from anybody about the molasses-like movement of Coyote Radio head honchos.
Why shouldn't we be able to broadcast the games? The equipment is up and running, station management has been aware of the volleyball program due to my summer-long diligence but I'm not broadcasting games three weeks into the season, with conference play beginning tonight against the nationally ranked Tritons of UC San Diego.
This could be a preview of the region championships and I'm sitting with my hands tied and no way to report on it.

Do you give a shit? Then express your discontent to Coyote Radio station manager Robin Lloyd at

Anyway, that's all for now kids. Thanks for tuning in. Hopefully my weekly show will start up again some time soon.

Best regards, and don't take any shit from anybody.


Monday, September 13, 2004

Weekend Sports update

Hey kids,

Compare my picks to Sunday's results and you may be impressed with my handicapping skills.
Tonight's contest between Green Bay and Carolina will determine if the Panthers are the real deal or a flash in the pan. The Turzman picks Carolina (53 combined points, for the tiebreaker).
Did anybody else pick Denver to beat KC? I should've put some money down on the Broncos, Mr. Collins. You would've given me points too! Ha ha ha!!!
Hey Johnny, how 'bout them Raiders? You were saying something about defense? I know I wasn't the only one to pick Pittsburgh, but there was some more money I could have won.

In my 3 team point parlee pool, I mustered only 66 points, despite having Minnesota and Seattle. Fucking Buffalo screwed me. Hey Drew Bledsoe, fuck you and the measly 10 points your sorry-ass team scraped together. You deserved to lose, you loser.
Next week's 3 teams are Dallas, Philadelphia, and San Diego. Too bad the Chargers are gonna lose to the Gotham Green. J - E - T - S, Jets - Jets - Jets!!!

Coyote Athletics--
Women's volleyball kicked ass again, 3-nil over Chico State and 3-nil over Cal State Stanislaus.
Great job ladies! We'll hopefully broadcast the games against nationally ranked UC San Diego Wednesday night and Grand Canyon University Thursday. I'm still not getting any answers about Coyote Radio. I need your support--

If you want to hear Coyote Women's Volleyball broadcast live over Coyote Radio, I need you to bug station manager Robin Lloyd--

Let him know you want to hear the ladies kick some ass and tell him The Turzman sent ya'!

c-ya later kids, thanks for the time. Shoot me an e-mail...
or call The Turzman PhanFone -- 909-881-3654.

Don't take any shit from anybody.